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); actually putting yourself out there at events and activities where you're likely to meet people; tapping into your network of friends for set-ups; and so on."It's about taking action, in more ways than one," she says.Maybe you'll take a slightly lesser position to be closer to family, or scale back on those 60-hour workweeks to devote more time to your relationship life."Carpenter says pick one or two categories or goals that you really want to devote yourself to, and put the majority of the emphasis there.

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That means your best bet is to maximize the most highly-datable options in the least amount of time, says Steinberg.

The best way to do this is to approach this part of your life with as much intention and effort as you would, say, your friendships or career.

"You have to decide how much time you can give to each of your priorities, and how much of you want to give to each priority," says Carpenter.

"As professional opportunities start to arise, you'll have to make decisions.

"Doing so will help you create what you want to create in your life—instead of just passively waiting for him to find you."You've probably met your fair share of men who would qualify for your own personal What Was I Thinking? Maybe you took a risk on that guy with the emotional issues, or that supposedly-reformed player with a laundry list of ex-flames.